Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize