oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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