Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(561): View more from Florida

Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.

(1-561): View more from Florida

He looks like a bad one night stand.

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(682): View more from Texas

you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower

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(630): View more from Illinois

I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg

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(630): View more from Illinois

She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...

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(949): View more from California

I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.

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(415): View more from California

You kept trying to hail an ambulance

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(620): View more from Kansas

I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot

(857): View more from Massachusetts

The struggle is real.

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(954): View more from Florida

WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!

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