maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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