how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
