you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
