He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize