how hairy? two words: wookie tits
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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