porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Randomize
