Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
so much tequila, so little girl.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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