I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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