9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
