we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
