you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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