so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It's no shave November. This is our time.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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