Its about making memories worth repressing
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
