You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
