all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize