you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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