If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
