what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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