i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
