She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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