$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
