Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize