"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
