I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Everclear isn't food dammit
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize