Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
