so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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