He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
