Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
