Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize