Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
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