honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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