that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
