I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
