What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
this hospital has no fireball
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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