i already hear my dad disowning me
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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