how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
