brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
