I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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