i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
