I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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