we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
