it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize