I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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