make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
