he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
