Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Randomize
