We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
that's an acceptable place to lick
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize