I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
