??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize